Yesterday (Friday, July 31, 2009) when mother arrived at the nursing home, the staff asked to talk with her about dad’s condition. He wasn’t eating or taking fluids as they couldn’t wake him up to eat or drink anything. He has a living will on file stating that they were not to take any extraordinary or heroic efforts on his behalf. It was decision time, they told her. If she wished, they would put him on an IV to keep him hydrated and put in a feeding tube so he could take nourishment. The alternative was for them to honor the living will and he would continue as is, that is not eating and not drinking anything.

They further told her that putting him on the tubes and bottles would only extend his life for an unknown period of time. He would not get any better. He would only continue a slow deterioration.

Today lots of family descended on Soda Springs as it is mother’s 85th birthday. My brother, his wife, along with his daughter Mindy and her family were there. Both my sisters came as well and Terry’s husband Allan came along. Nina and I, along with our daughter Heather and her son Michael, and our son Daryl and his wife Laura were there. That provided a unique opportunity to have a family council and help mother with this decision.

Everyone there affirmed that dad would not want to continue in this state. Further, mother said that if it were her in his situation, she also would not want to continue. There is a better, happier place to be.

So, no extraordinary or heroic measure will be taken. The staff said he could die within the next week to ten days. They will keep him comfortable and make certain he’s feeling no pain.

The end is very near.