A couple of days ago I was talking with our Home Teacher about when we might get together for our monthly visit. He and his wife, in addition to being our good friends, are also assigned as our Home Teachers. We decided because the only time available was the last day of the month, that we would go out to dinner together and have a fun evening together. They picked us up a little after 5 p.m. and we went to the new Ruby Tuesday restaurant for dinner. And we had a Very.Lovely.Time! They are fun to be with, the restaurant is quite conducive to having a conversation, and the food is great. I had the most delicious lobster ravioli and will definitely have to go back there to do that one again. I think I’ve found the absolute celestial marriage of pasta and lobster….

Earlier this morning we drove over to Soda Springs to spend some time with mother and dad at the nursing home. Dad had a good day, I think. Nina brought lunch so we had his lunch brought out to the table in the famiy area and we all had lunch together. I had brought a hardware and tools catalog which dad enjoyed looking at (and will probably spend some time studying). Nina really got him laughing and hopefully she’ll post some pictures.

The stats also say that he’s doing OK. He’s nicely hydrated and is eating well. He’s not having trouble eliminating. His vitals are in good shape. According to the chart he’s having a very typical rebound which happens to most people when they first get into the nursing home. He’s definitely rebounded, which is a marked change from when he went into the emergency room three weeks ago and the doctor told us that he could easily pass away at any moment. That danger is past. He will not get into a position that he can go home as he’s still quite unstable and lacks the strength to get himself from sitting to standing and back down. He also cannot get himself up when he falls on the floor.

It’s fairly typical for a nursing home patient to rally after they’re admitted. Their getting a better diet, a much more regimented atmosphere, plenty of fluids, and physical therapy tailored to their situation. If that rally happens, then they’ll probably do well until another episode, which often is brought about by a cold or the flu. If that degenerates into pneumonia, then things can get very bad very quickly.

The charts also say that he’s good to stay under Medicare for at least another three weeks. So we’ve got a little more time before the financial situation changes.

Life is good!

Nina and I spent a few hours with dad and mother at the nursing home yesterday. Dad seems to be rallying a bit and his condition continues to improve somewhat. He’s gotten also a bit ornery. He has begun to insist on going home. Unfortunately that’s not going to happen. He cannot stand up by himself and most of the time when he tries, he falls backwards into the chair (or if the chair isn’t locked down, onto the floor). He occasionally is successful in getting himself partially out of bed and then falls the rest of the way out onto the floor. Once he’s on the floor, two people are required to get him back upright.

This is the main reason that he’s at the nursing home. Mother cannot get him upright when he falls on the floor. She doesn’t have the strength to be able to help him transition to his walker from the toilet. If he gets even slightly out of his center-of-gravity balance area, he’s on the floor.

Meanwhile, his color is back to normal. His vital signs are pretty good: blood pressure fairly constant in the 100 / 60 range and pulse rate in the high 70’s. His temperature is normal and his blood sugar ranges from 80 to 130, all of which are certainly very acceptable. For a while his blood pressure was continuing to decrease, but the doctor has modified his medications and the blood pressure has stabilized.

He has very little strength in his legs, but when the physical therapist works with him and coaches him through the process of standing (all the while keeping a firm grip on him), dad can often get himself into a standing position from his wheel chair. Unaided and unguided, however, he fails every time.

It’s no mystery why he wants to go home. He seems to have no life anymore. There’s so much that he still wants to do. But, his body cannot keep up with his brain. Getting old sucks!

Nina and I drove over to Soda Springs today to visit with dad and work with mother on anything she needs done. Dad was up and getting around fairly well. He’s somewhat confused about time and people but I’m sure it’s easy to mix dreams and reality in this place. We’ll be here through mid-afternoon.

Nina and I spent the day at the nursing home in Soda Springs with dad. He had a pretty good day today. He did quite a bit of walking up and down the hallway using his walker. He also had several visitors, including his brother Ross and a couple of my cousins. It was a lot of fun to visit with them as well. When we left about 6 p.m. he was ready for some peace and quiet, I’m sure.

My sister Terry came up yesterday and took mother with her back to Far West for the night. This morning they went shopping and mother had a good time shopping for clothes and accessories. She got back in time to spend some time with the visiting folks and get into the picture.

Meanwhile, we had a nice weekend. Friday night we went to the Idaho State Civic Symphony concert which featured a number of love songs from Opera. It was just delightful. I love opera and could have listened to much more.

We spent Saturday afternoon at the Idaho Falls Temple. We did a session at 3 p.m. and then attended a Chapel session at 5:15 p.m. as part of our Ward Conference (even though neither of us could attend our Ward Conference on Sunday). We then hurried back to Pocatello to return to the Performing Arts Center for a Roger Williams performance. That was an outstanding performance. He has incredibly nimble fingers and he clearly loves what he’s doing on stage.

Yesterday was pretty quiet afternoon. I had Church meetings until about 1:30 p.m. (the third Sunday of the month is my light Sunday for meetings). This morning we left at 9 a.m. so we could spend the day with dad while mother was away and so she wouldn’t have to worry too much about how dad was doing.

I was very encouraged by dad’s condition today. While he won’t be coming home from the nursing home, he doesn’t seem to be in imminent danger of dying anytime soon. Life is good.

The days seem to be jumbling together lately. But, there’s been good things happening. For instance, our oldest son James and his family made a very quick trip out here so they could spend a little bit of time with dad. Its a choice similar to the one we made when Nina’s father was fading quickly. I was working in Japan and we could only make one trip home for him … either to spend some time with him before he died or to attend the funeral. We choose to spend some time with him before he died and that has turned out to be a good choice. Dad certainly appreciated their visit and recognized them. He was lucid for a time while they were there which is definitely a blessing.

Dad was a bit better today than the past few days. As noted in an earlier post (sent from my iPhone as we were driving home from the nursing home), he was up, dressed, and did some physical therapy today. That was all goodness.

He’s not getting better, however. He just has an occasional “good” day mixed into more and more “not-so-good” days. He definitely wants to go home, but that’s not in the cards for him, either.

Mother and I spent some time at the Simms Funeral Home in Soda Springs this afternoon. Simms will be handling the funeral when dad dies. We had a couple of purposes for going over there today. First, we wanted to get a good estimate of all the costs associated with dad’s funeral and burial. Secondly, we wanted to discuss the various methods of paying for those costs. We were able to get all of mother’s questions answered and got a good deal of information. Simms is a very reputable operation and has been in business in Soda Springs for thirty years.

Their burial plots in the Cleveland Cemetery have already been purchased and the headstone is already in place. Everything else will cost about $7,500. The big-ticket items are the casket (about $2,000), the vault ($900), and the funeral home processes ($3,000). Mother has done some planning for the funeral program. We’re kind of thinking of having the funeral in the late morning (about 11?) followed by the interment in Cleveland. That would be followed by a family dinner, probably at the new chapel in Niter before people leave to go home. Comments and suggestions welcome.

It’s important to remember, however, that dad is definitely still alive and (kinda) kicking. He’s already defied our expectations many times over.

Funds to pay for the funeral and interment are not the issue. There are several insurance policies as well as more than sufficient cash on hand. The question is whether or not dad will need to be transferred from skilled nursing into the normal nursing home. While his bed and room wouldn’t change, the payment method definitely changes. His costs are currently being paid by Medicare. That plan will pay up to 20 days of skilled nursing (as long as he’s making sufficient progress) at 100% and another 80 days at 80% (and his Monsanto insurance will pick up 80% of the deductable). The sticker is “sufficient progress”. That isn’t going to happen very long. When that process ends, he goes onto “self pay”. That means mother has to pay out of his assets (based on a fairly complicated formula and procedure that allocates all of their joint assets) until his assets are all but used up. Then Medicaid will kick in.

We’re allowed to take sufficient money out of his assets to pay for his funeral and burial expenses, but that money has to be set aside in an irrevocable trust or the appropriate insurance policies have to be signed over to the funeral home. So, we’re investigating the options and will need to make some decisions Real Soon Now.

On another unrelated note, the property owners in Pocatello dealt a death blow to our public school system by defeating the supplemental levy. This levy expires every two years and has been voted up every two years for many, many years until this vote. The levy provides about 10% of the school district’s expenses. Losing that money by itself is very problematic. Coupled with the significant cutbacks in state funding, the defeat of the levy will put the schools into an impossible situation. They will not be able provide the government mandated education. They also won’t be able to provide the services that the community thinks they should be providing.

A goodly part of the blame for the failure lies with the school administration who didn’t take this issue seriously enough to do what was needed to sell the supplemental levy to the taxpayers. A share of the blame resides with one bull-headed (and very stupid) local wannabe politician who campaigned against the levy as way to show how fiscally conservative he is so he can finally prevail in an election. He’s trying to push his own selfish agenda on the broken backs of our students. I suspect that the district will float another, smaller levy in hopes of salvaging something. However, the other politician, who I won’t name because I don’t want him to have any more publicity, will be even more emboldened.

Another part of the blame lays at the feet of our new President of Change. Some part of the “stimulus” package is supposed to go to schools. A lot has been made of that in the press including our local, and as usual, out-of-touch newspaper. Even if the money actually stays in the “stimulus” package, there’s no guarantee that any of it will get to our local school district. Further, if any of it does (there are too many sticking places along the way here), it will at best replace about 25% of what the levy generates.

I am very disappointed in the voters in our school district and sickened by the actions of a local wannabe politician. I will do everything I can to make sure he never, ever, gets elected to anything.

We arrived at the nursing home to find dad dressed and sitting on his chair. That’s a nice change. He did some physical therapy this morning and some more after lunch. By then he was completely worn out. Mother and I spent some time at Simms Funeral Home to begin making arrangements. The folks there were helpful and answered all of mother’s questions.

Dad has been mostly unresponsive today, much the same as yesterday. He’ll wake up every once in a while and talk for a couple of sentences and then drift back to sleep. The physical therapist came by a couple of times but wasn’t able to get dad to respond.

Meanwhile, I’ve been thinking a lot about my uncle Delon who died a year ago. Last February we drove down to Las Cruces, NM for his funeral. The youngest child was the first to go and now the oldest is probably next.

This afternoon Delon’s daughter (and my cousin) Cheryl delivered a lovely baby daughter. Mother, daughter, husband Sean, and their boys are all doing well. Congrats, Sean and Cheryl!